Am I stupid? (the art of self-care)

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The other day I was talking to a colleague whose mother had BC & radiation & had finished a few months ago. Her mother used to own a hotel but now works as a cashier at a supermarket because ‘you know, it’s low stress.’

‘Oh yeah, right,’ I thought. ‘That.’

I was going home from the teaching job that day to write this post and then after if I had time I’d work on the Academy modules.

Am I stupid?

I started thinking about all I had done in the past year…

I joined the coaching certification course in the same week I had my operation.

I came back to Switzerland & started the course in January while looking for & getting further treatment here.

I finished writing my novel while I was having radiation.

I set up my coaching business (also while having radiation & since ) – which is so much more of an emotional ride than these 6 little words can express.

I went to L.A. & Paris for further training.

And now I’m teaching full-time for 10 wks, while I run my business, coach & do Academy work …..

As you can imagine, it has been a million miles from easy. There has been so much to learn and to manage, most importantly my emotions, and there has even been STRESS… quite a bit of it at times.

Am I stupid?

Why do I do it?

Why did I not take the year off and just do what I already knew to do?

Why?

Because the unfulfilled life was causing more stress than these deadlines. I would see other people getting to do creative and meaningful work they loved and I’d think – why can’t that be me?

My mentor, Gina DeVee, quoted the following from A Course In Miracles this week…

 ‘Sometimes the rest we seek does not come from sleep.’

Sometimes the rest we seek comes from chasing our dreams.

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Sometimes the rest we seek comes from doing the work.

What causes me restlessness is when there’s something I know I should be doing but I’m avoiding it. So I’m doing it now – I’m in the thick of it – and if you are too or you’re wondering how you can be, the question is…

How do I take care of myself when my life is so full?

Well, sometimes the rest we seek really does come from sleep!

On Thursday, when I wanted to write this article and was not feeling enthused about any of the ideas I had and had already done almost all I know to do to get those downloads (prayed, meditated, journalled, read, plucked my eyebrows) and couldn’t be bothered to go for a walk at 9pm, I finally looked in the mirror and thought, ‘I really just want to go to bed.’

‘So go!’ I answered.

Sometimes the rest comes from letting go.

I know I can’t do all I would like to right now and so I am doing the best I can.

Letting go doesn’t mean you forget about your goals, but in the present moment you can ask yourself, ‘what do I require right now?’ and not get stressed out that it will always be this way.

You let go of the results you want right now and open yourself up to new possibilities (and perhaps more sleep).

What do you require right now?

Blueberries?

Blueberries?

 

Sometimes the rest comes from accepting our situation.

A lot of energy can go into wishing things to be different, like wishing you had more time rather than creating it or just accepting that right now you don’t have tons and maxing out the time you have. Wishing things to be different creates turmoil, stress and dissatisfaction. From a place of acceptance, we can ask ‘How can I bring about transformation in this area? What needs to happen?’ rather than fight against what is.

So part of my self-care is accepting where I am right now and being grateful. I find many ways to infuse pleasure into my day – like dressing up for work or sitting and enjoying the view while I have my coffee.

How can you infuse more pleasure into your present situation?

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That’s one way…

Sometimes the rest comes from saying no.

Often we agree to do things before we have the chance to think about it properly and perhaps we aren’t even aware of the resentment we are feeling because we get used to it or can’t even fathom that it can be any different.

The women I’ve coach often feel that saying ‘no’ is scary or impossible – even though it means sacrificing building a business or having time for creative endeavours that actually mean money and meaningful work. We care so much about how other people would feel and we live our lives accommodating others at the expense of our own joy and our own dreams.

In order to write a novel I had to say no a lot. Now I am working that muscle again because saying no to certain things means saying yes to working on my business and doing more of what I love  – like my dance class or Sunday excursions to the mountains.

That’s why saying no is a part of my self-care regime.

What is draining your time and energy? What would you love to say no to?

(I dare you to do it!)

Sometimes the rest comes from getting support.

Living as an expat & away from my family & close friends, this area can be the biggest challenge for me. So one way I’ve been taking better care of myself lately is by getting coaching to grow my business. It means I don’t have to figure it all out myself and I have a space in the week that is just for me. It’s a place of restoration, as well as growth. I have invested time and money in myself and have a mentor who is providing this larger container of support for me. I can relax, knowing I am being guided, and still I do the work, knowing that this is what I’ve invested in.

How would you love to get more support this week?

Sometimes the rest comes from romancing yourself stupid. 

In the end what is life without pink roses, massages and dressing well? What would we be without dancing and music and fresh raspberries? This week I doubled my dance dose and did something a little daring up in the trees (with zip lines!). We walked down a mountain and went off-road in the forrest. I worked on my business at my favourite café, read for my pleasure and just sat and stared out the bus window one morning. Sometimes the rest comes through beauty and sometimes it comes from truly switching off.

How can you be the best lover you ever had this week? (Be spontaneous! Be stupid!)

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I’d wanted to call this article ‘The art of extreme self-care’ but then I thought, ‘Extreme? What so extreme about it?’.

Sometimes self-care is enough.

♥  I’d love to know how you practice the art of self-care and which of these poses the greatest challenge to you. Please let me know in the comments below ♥

I coach those who have been through a health crisis and are ready to ACTIVELY heal by releasing the victim and empowering yourself to create a life you love – altering the conditions which supported the illness in the first place. If you would love to know more, book your discovery session today and see if I am the right coach for you.

 

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